I’m good today, I’m feeling very humble about life, humble about myself and lucky. Lucky because I have come to this healthy mind-set. I have understand and accepted that I’m only human and can only do as best as I can.
I don’t know if I have mentioned before but I have bad PMS, I have chosen to be honest about it because I know I’m not the only one dealing with it. The more I posted about my PMS on my Instagram, the more people came to me and start to understand what THEY are going through. You cannot hide and hush hush things that are “normal”. With normal I mean, they happen to mostly everyone.
A normal PMS period can look like this: I’m very emotional but mostly ANGRY. Angry and I feel jumped, I feel like my world is just not enough. I have done so much in order to get better, to not be controlled by my PMS. I have tried different seeds, change diet, and change everything in order to get “normal”. After years of being without contraceptive and feeling natural I decide to start with the coil, painful as FXXX and not comfortable at all. Another post later about that.
I don’t know if the coil is helping but I doubt it. I haven’t been consistent with my seeds as I used to before, I have been doing a lot of yoga and a lot of breathing exercises. I have trained me massively, meaning I have told myself that I cannot let people control my feelings or demand how I respond to life. I have trying my hardest to be mindful of my surrounding. – Has it helped? YES!
What I have realized is that I’m a powerful human being and only I can change my life to the better. When you finally accept that you are not here to be a slave or to be miserable or to just please others, you understand the beauty of life. Please, don’t get me wrong I do have horrible days. I have concerns at the moment with my family and I’m in between going back home to Sweden every month or maybe stay there for a few months. So my life isn’t all pink clouds but I have chosen to see my life from a positive perspective. I cannot go around and tell the same bloody sad story about my life every day, I need new positive stories to tell, to inspire people, to create a better atmosphere in life. I’m far from a bad person, I don’t like to hurt anyone and yes I do wrong and I have done massive wrong in life. Karma has chased me and got me, but I don’t continue to do them and I don’t continue with the bad circle just to revenge. I don’t. I pay for my actions and I’m done. I believe in being mindful, I believe in minding others and get the best out of life. I don’t believe in blaming your actions on other people, or blaming why you did this on others. Yes yes yes, people will push you and will test you, demand from you. BUT IT IS YOUR DECISION TO NOT BE PUSHED TO THE EDGE. It is your decision to approach what you are being pushed to in a descent way. When I hear people using the words, you pushed me, she pushed me. Honey, nobody physically pushed you. You was weak enough to push yourself all the way. And we have all been there, pushed a little and we push ourselves all the way to the edge and plan to blame others for our outrageous actions.
A practical example of being mindful or how I try to be mindful is this one: I usually get angry on the train because I never get to sit and they always packed and people are rude. So I can be negative, although this year I have stopped. Yesterday two people pushed me so hard that my pees to breast turned to mosquito bites. I mean you know when people intentionally want to hurt you. They are aware of their actions, they are aware that you will feel bad but still do it. I pray for all of you, and I also hope that karma won’t hit you too hard. For your own sake. People doing things like that are weak minded, strong and good people don’t purposely want to hurt others. Just so you know, a healthy mind will think ahead and what your actions do.
I’m not perfect, far far far from perfect but you know what guys? I want to create a happy life for me and my family, for the people around me, I want happy people around me and people that are genuine. I can only create that by starting with myself and doing my best in life. Everything starts with you.
I wish we could all try our best, I wish we could all be genuine nice and not just pretend because you think that people will like you more. A genuine person wins all the way, a fake person wins temporarily and lose by the end. Might not lose in a way so other people can see it, but loses in a way that she/he is suffering inside.
Done with my stories, I just want to wish you guys a good Wednesday. And I hope that you can get to where you want to be. Create amazing relationships and live life.