I have just finished my evening routine, did all the things I do a normal Sunday before Monday. I’m planning on treating Monday like a normal work day. I don’t want to think to much of being at home and working. I will try, at least get up early and do my run, have my breakfast and be at my “desk” sharp 9.30am.
I wanted just share something I experienced this week. It is more like an insight of how we sometimes, or I use my time. There is no question that we have a lot of time on our plates, yes I do a lot but I still have more time to for example care about things I normally would just see and be like ok well.
Caring about things or giving something attention and be expressive is not a good combo. I like to be expressive and I do enjoy ranting or just post whatever I want to. I don’t expect anyone to read my blog but if you do, your choice. I don’t think much about who is reading it, it is my little “hub”. Even though it is my place where I share things, I try to be careful because you never know. I have many times thought about my content, not because it is for anyone to live after ( ha ha ) but I don’t want to offend anyone with my opinions or maybe the way I make decisions etc. I think if you choose to be public we also have to think a little bit about your content. My purpose here is to be expressive without being judgemental, but I’m a human being and unfortunately things I don’t do – I can be judgemental about even though it doesn’t even touches me. Sad, I know.
I don’t have a problem with being open about my flaws, and when I do something meh. I find it very useful to write, let it out and also like I have said before: maybe someone out there is doing same things as me and think oh okey, so I’m not alone.
We aren’t alone in reacting, or wasting time on unnecessary things. We all do that, we all spend hours analysing something so stupid. And we really don’t give two flying fxxxs about.
Acknowledge things and be aware and I think we have to ask ourselves the question: and why do I care? What will this bring to me? I try to tell this to myself.
I think we have to think more, and not let our egos express so much. I think even our feelings can sometimes mislead us to bigger things we don’t need. Bigger drama.
I found myself annoyed at something with work, reality is I’m fed up with working from home now. I said something silly about the way something was done and was ranting, and my way of ranting did not come across great. There is a tension around us, the unpredictable, and the fact that we will never go back to normal. Also this year is basically done. Easy to get stuck and express negative feelings.
Lashing out seems common lately, I check up on all my friends and ask them the same question: How are you holding up? And yes, we all struggling more or less. I have heard many people having difficulties with feeling motivated, happy during the days, or find useful things to do, keeping up, and not get too bored. It is so easy to get fed up by the monotone. I don’t even blame people for lashing out or maybe having a mental breakdown. We hold soooo much in us every day because life forces to focus on working, not having a mental breakdown, not feel sorry for ourselves, work harder, progress, get fit, be balanced, that we barely take time to wind down, and ask ourselves how we are today. We only check ourselves when we find us in drama with our own misery.
I can be a spoiled and forget how lucky I’m, I forget that many “problems” I have aren’t even any issues really. My only concern is saving money now, filling up the pot and move on from there. I’m fine with everything else apart from the whole corona virus that is affecting us regardless. I do have to remind myself more often about my blessings, I do it but maybe I should do it even more. When you focus on the good, you aren’t bothered by the things around you. Good advice to myself.
Let’s just remind ourselves, every time we want to lash, make a point, stand your ground, and all of that. Ask yourself first, is it worth it? Sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes we have to remember that the outside is the outside, and it shouldn’t get to you on a deep level. Not an ounce of bullshit is worth my sanity or spirit.
Honestly, let that shit pass and dont pick it up. Stop minding what others do, this is also an advice to myself. We have to start living our own lives, because by the end of the day no one knows your pure intensions. We spend time trying to justify ourselves and explain why, sometimes we have to let it just be. Done is done and more fuel creates more drama.
This is my weekly lesson haha. Know who and when you should deliver your opinion, concern, explanation, and care. I say this to everyone, we have to maintain our peace and other people are not worth stressing for. Honestly. We should aim for more positive energy, positive attitude and yes shit happens and we can get affected by it. Think of your mental health and try not to let things who do not play a big role in your life take over. Sometimes things aren’t about you, even if you are the first one to see or hear it. Don’t express yourself to harsh or too much about something you don’t know fully. I have learned and still learning to stop before moving to the next step. Easier said than done.
Ok, I will let this end here as I just wanted to share my thoughts and remind us to stop sometimes before we are too quick to express ourselves.