TIPS – Coco Nativo

It is no secret that I’m trying to be more mindful when it comes to buying and saving money, yes trying.
I always search for the good quality and affordable coconut oil, or any other oil actually.

To my home, I have just received my two big jars of coconut oil. Cost me only £15 and it is 920g each. How good?

I was using another brand, also from Germany but I can’t remember the name. CocoNativo is German and I love German products. If you have been to well, Berlin – you will see so many vegan places, bio organic food store and they are Eco friendly more than here. In my opinion, but I have only been to Berlin.

The reviews were good enough, and the price… £5.95. I mean bargain, and I got two for £14.95 and it took 2 days to get to my house. I only use coconut oil to moisturize my skin, as it is the only thing that keeps it healthy. Or if I make my own butter, although pure coconut oil is perfect.

Tips: one for the skin and one for the kitchen.

Ebony Wood

I’m my mothers daughter, lately I have been collecting perfumes. And they have to be unique or at least that everyone is wearing. I usually use oil perfumes as they create a better and more unique scent with your natural body scent. As I said lately I have been collecting perfumes, I have got a few ones as present and my mum always has a box full of weird but good perfumes. Perfumes I have never even heard of before, but she goes after the tones and calculates how they are gonna be? She is weird.

Anyhow I bought a couple of perfumes from Zara, Jo Malone created a few new fragrance for Zara. Smell really nice and are affordable.
I went for Fleur D’Oranger and Ebony Wood.

Fleur D’Oranger is similar to one perfume I have had before from Rituals, Fleur D’Oranger has notes of: neroli, ylang yland and orange flower (orange blossom?). Fleur D’Oranger from Zara, it does smell like babies? You know this specific cologne they have for babies? Well in Ecuador we have this special baby perfumes (don’t ask me) and they smell similar. The perfume matches a sunny early spring kinda day.

Ebony Wood is also similar to another perfume I had years ago, the one I had was: Pomegranate Noir*. This perfume brings a lot of good memories, 2014 was all about that perfume. Ebony Wood, has peppercorn, clove and ebony wood notes. Not the same notes, but they are similar in terms of the woody touch. Because it is more spicy, for evenings rather.

I have so many perfumes, and I will continue to show my little collection of weird fragrances. One of my favorite perfume is, tobacco vanilla. Yes! Everything, but I use it a bit different and more for the evenings.

*Jo Malone – Pomegrante Noir scent notes:
Daring sensuality, encapsulated in scent. Ruby-rich juices of exotic pomegranate, spiked with pink pepper and laced with Casablanca lily. Warmed by temptingly-smoky guaiacwood and patchouli. Dark and enigmatic


A tired Tuesday but I have had a good day, lots of talk and planning and trying to get life sorted. I have been dreaming so much lately, and there is a specific place in my dream that keeps on coming back? It is very weird I can’t even explain it. Anyhow, I’m not doing gym today and will just food prep. I went yesterday and wow I have been killing my abs, I have a six pack but only to be seen when no food has been around. LOL.

My body needs food, and good food every two hours in order to maintain a good weight. I have been sea-food-vegan-flexi-good lately with my health, I feel leaner but more muscle mass and more toned? How I see myself, you may think I look meeeeh.. but that is none of my biz. The picture above was a week ago I think?

And this picture was yesterday, my abs are defo coming forward. It takes time to build a strong core, honestly. I have been dealing with gym for now 3 years, constant and it is NOW my belly finally feels stronger. I guess, that cliche saying does make sense: practice makes it perfect.

I’m gonna head home now from work, I wont visit the gym today. Some muscles on the back of my knees hurt massively. I did Bikram on Sunday and hard core gym yday, let me rest.

I never know what to write once I open my blog, it is like all these topics and ideas disappear. I have quiet few reader now and I’m so amazed that people visit this basic blog. I will make it more fun, and soon I’m doing something and I think I would love to film it and put it out there. I will see…


Yday Tuesday I booked a hot yoga class. I only like hot yoga, I like the sweat feeling and the body feels more flexible. The teacher was pretty good.

I have been doing a lot of yoga at home everyday and I so surprised that I keeping it up, although yday was the first day in two weeks I did a class. It felt good, and I’m still not as bad and can hold poses. I’m always a bit rusty at first but I guess doing it at home has helped me to keep up.

I do yoga in all different places as I’m using classpass. My favourite is Sadhana in Clapham, Bikram London Bridge is also good but a bit too typical dance class a little bit I guess? They are good though, I love bikram. Easy to get very lean quick as well, if you keep it up. I’m gonna try once a week as I’m a bit lazy lately, I go to the gym and I’m active but I’m just like meh. Anyhow for March I’m gonna change the game a bit. Still doing vegetarian/vegan and I feel good.

My yoga class was at 3tribes in Borough. Very close to London Bridge. Very nice place actually, should have taken some pictures but no was so into my zone afterwards.

Feeling the retrograde by the way? I feel it and I can say that many people are walking on my shoes. And I’m standing here just smiling and trying to not lash out. Don’t get it twisted, I’m still gonna have my say. I’m a person that waits and sees if what you are doing is a piss taking or you are just so unaware of your own behavior? Anyhow, this is how I can be but I miss the days when I’m just a yes man and sometimes don’t even care to care about what I stand for. Don’t be a hypocrite or try not to.

They are worse or they are better.

I saw this picture and couldn’t hold my self from sharing my thoughts. Do we have people like this in our lives? Well yes, we all have and I always pay attention to people’s repeated behaviour. I’m not judging but if the behaviour is towards me, then yes I will keep an eye on you. I see it as some sort of self care, be mindful of how people have habits of treating you this or that.

I have a close person who I’m not gonna share much details about but this person has a funny way of treating me. Every time I question the behaviour, I get this puppy feel sorry for me and I didn’t mean to do it kinda BS. So even this person has a habit of ALWAYS being worse or better than you. If you say, oh my ankles are aching – the person would come and say: my whole foot is replaced. Just to be the first to be in the worse position. Why is that? Why are we humans this way? Why are certain humans this way? I have so many stories and wow I hope I’m not behaving like this all the time.

This picture just clicked, and funny that the picture came up at the same time as I’m dealing with a specific person over the phone. It is never a smooth moment of interaction, there is always something BAD in the person situation. Nothing is personal but it gets daunting hearing a person always having something bad to say or projecting theirs negative start of the morning on you. I’m not perfect believe me but can we be more mindful or each other? Can we be more mindful of how we come across to others? How we actually do impact others with our low/negative energy. People who only want to be in a good energy when it suits them, sorry but no if you are in a bad mood go home and lock yourself or behave.

Anyhow back to the picture, I guess at many times I have tried to be this one that is better at something. I rather better myself than say that I’m in the worse situation and please feel sorry for me. U wanna improve life not belittle life and see as a failure.

What we don’t understand when we self pity ourselves is that we ask for more of the negative rather than ask for improvements.

Humans. We all do things we don’t like in others. Life wouldn’t be this exciting if things always changed and people acted difficult and tried too much. As we all do. I don’t exclude myself from everything bad we all do, I’m a human and I do all the things I cuss other people to. I write for us to remember to be mindful and for myself to always be reminded.

Apart from this rant, I have been feeling good lately within. Feel happier and have this massive gratitude speech to myself not long ago. I was honestly crying of joy, joy because what I have now, I was writing down a list and couldn’t wait to have all of this. Wow, you do forget what you have been dying to have in the future. The future comes and you forget to look back. Sometimes it is good, it gives you a flashback analysis.

Ok, starting my day now and I wish you all a lovely Friday.


Sustainable periods – HeyGirls

This January was my first try of my menstrual cup use. If I like it? Well I must say it feels safer than a tampon.

I read about it maybe for two years before deciding to jump on this blood bath. Yes, I was scared to accumulate so much blood and not be able to handle it. Well, you can. You can handle you. And this whole thing is you.

They have a guideline for females, depending on their life situation. They advice females being older than 25+ and pregnant, should use size medium. Or try and see. There is so much to read and know before buying, also speak open about this so people can educate themselves and feel more free talking about this.

I went for size small, and I’m over 30 and no kids. Everything depends on yourself and how you are “designed” down there. Everyone is unique.

I won’t go into details on how to insert it, but it is hard at first lol but then you just get use to it. What I liked about it was the fact, it felt safe during my gym session and I was more active and it gave me power to push harder and heavier. Honestly, when I’m on my period I’m more active than when I’m not? Really strange, well at least at the gym.

Benefits using a menstrual cup are:

  • Unlike tampons, menstrual cups don’t dry the vagina. This preserves the healthy bacteria that protect you from vaginal infections.
  • Menstrual cups aren’t associated with toxic shock syndrome (TSS), which is a rare, life-threatening condition linked to tampon use.
  • Menstrual cups don’t contain chemicals found in tampons and pads, such as bleach and dioxin. According to the World Health Organization (WHO)Trusted Source, some dioxins are known to cause cancer in humans.
  • Many women report having less severe cramping when using cups, although no clinical studies have been performed to support this.
  • Menstrual fluid develops an odor when exposed to air. Cups eliminate this issue.
  • Most women report that they don’t even feel the cup when it’s in place. In my opinion, I don’t feel it at all.
  • Reusable menstrual cups are environmentally friendly. The Women’s Environmental Network reports that each year more than 400 million poundsTrusted Source of sanitary pads, tampons, and tampon applicators end up in landfills.

I bough my cup via HeyGirls, it is company run by a mother and two daughters. Single mother that wanted to create something we all females need but affordable, helping girls to remove that bad stigma of periods like it is a sin, helping to prevent period poverty. Because a lot of people find it shameful, many young girls don’t go to school and become more insecure and some females don’t have money to get decent and good pads or less toxic. Educate your kids and the people around you, and maybe create more brands that are helping young girls to still feel safe.

Anyhow, I like what HeyGirls are doing in the UK. It was an idea I had myself before, I’m glad this is getting more and more awareness. Specially sustainability involved.

Hey Girls – to offer you a no leak, super comfy, chlorine and bleach free, environmentally friendly product that tackles period poverty in the UK. How? Well that’s simple – all the profits from our Buy One Give One products go directly to help girls and young women in need – no fat cat shareholders taking a payout. So that means for every box you buy we give a box away- yep just that straightforward.”

I’m super happy with mine and really advice everyone else to start. Saves so much money. Better for the environment, and I’m so surprised I feel so safe using it while exercising.

Only cost: £8.95 cheaper than most and help young girls.

A letter to Sweden.

I have always believed in the need of letting it all out, verbally, written, physically or in any way that heals us from the inside. By this stage many know my resentment towards Sweden, the country I have constantly blamed for how I have felt. I have felt angry, hatred and disgust and every time someone mention Sweden it gave me goosebumps. I felt I’m done with you and all that comes with it. I have regardless visited Sweden and forced myself to be there because like everyone says: you grow up here? Yes but is it healthy go through the uncomfortable just because it is a place where I grow up? Well my feelings towards Sweden had to do with blame, I blame how naive I was, how I was this and what I went through. But I haven’t gone through more or less than any of my friends? We were all together in the deep rooted need of being there for one another. We had divorced parents, school grades we were unhappy with, parents who maybe weren’t there for us, a couple of us lost our fathers. The only difference between me and my friends was, I came from a different country where I created a life during 10 years prio to Sweden. My mother tongue is Spanish, my culture is Latino, my ways of being were different. By the end of the day, I was a teenager and failed like we all did. It was a part of life isn’t it? I have honestly pushed it away and force myself to believe that a country could take something from me? It didn’t take anything; it just gave me more tools to be unhappy with like a typical teenager. Did my parents do a bad job? No they did as much as they knew and know. Our parents, they are gold and above and beyond. We wouldn’t deal with life like we manage today if we didn’t have them in our lives. We can’t blame our parents or ourselves, it is life.

So here Am I and finally found closure, finally found the urge to come back very soon. Finally I’m leaving in peace and happy. Happy because I spend time with the most important people in my life. The people that is the reason I’m moving, honestly.

The negative view I have had had been bad, how much I have felt proper down in Sweden and like something is missing. What is missing is my attitude to welcome it and accept it as it is.

Sitting on the bus now, on my way to the airport and seeing all green land, the beautiful sky and the fresh air outside. It is beautiful it is bliss. I understand why people enjoy being here. It has taken me 6 years and more to find it satisfying and fun to be here. I think that also comes with boundaries, how I have allowed my energy to be taken and myself to be taken. I’m positive and want to be free from pressure – I have taken the pressure off by accepting things as they are. sometimes you have to surrender and accept it.

When you surrender, it is fucking hard. It is hard because it is like letting go a piece of yourself, your personality – the person you are. Let’s take an example of my latest healing process, it was quite hard to start 2020. It felt like proper growing pains, leaving all behind, trying to accept, trying to continue to accept the person I’m and becoming. Accept that life isn’t fair. Accept that life isn’t fair? Hold on, I’m a libra how is that gonna be possible? I live like this. It gave me belly ache, removing ways of yourself because they do not work anymore and they don’t take you as far as you would like to go. It has become stressful to always stand up for myself, for details for this and that or them. It has cost me time, energy, jobs and effort. There are time I’m proud of that side of me, and I’m glad I have that. I’m glad I’m not letting people take the piss. Even my cousins in Ecuador had said to my mum: Maria is strict and straight forward.

Does it always work to be equal or to try to demand equality? No not always. This happened all January, I was analysing and feeling it. How does it feel to stop reacting to all unfairness every time? It is life – life isn’t fair. It is fucking not. All I can say is that, I’m balancing it or try to see how I’m gonna balance it in present and future. This characteristic trace I have, isn’t with me for no reason. You don’t have a hard core way of being for no reason, it is either trying to teach you or regardless it is a tool for life. Depends how you use it. And here I’m now learning that. We have to learn in life that not everyone is waiting for you to fall. The only person that you will ever disappoint is yourself. So whatever job you do with yourself , that is between you and you.

I have finally taken myself as the only person responsible for any actions taken in my life. And there is where I let go of Sweden but I embrace it with open arms, and say thank you for giving me comfort, a life, friends for life, a home, school, possibilities, memories, trips, laughter, drunken nights, lost nights, too many hangover days, my own little flat, a chance to try university for free.

It wasn’t fair always, but that was life. And I would never go back and change it. Ever. I feel emotionally because this time I felt more grounded and thankful.

Once you have accepted who you are in life, who you becoming and how your life today isn’t the same as it was ten years ago. Your boundaries changes, you no longer tolerate what once was, you respect yourself and unfortunately not everyone is ready for the new grown ass person you are creating. It scares many, but this is how life goes. We move on, we change and we change for only ourselves. No one else.

Oh well, this was one of the most peaceful post I have written about Sweden. I feel done having remorse and resentment towards Sweden, I feel like I can finally go back to sweden again and enjoy it with new eyes, new positive energy and perspective. I didn’t know Sweden was the “person” I needed to dedicated a letter to. But doing that, it helped me to let go of ALOT.

Write a letter, to a place, person, or something you feel strong feelings for. Either positive or negative ones. Let it out?

Queen & Slim

I started my weekend with such a great feeling film event at the BFI in South Bank. A few months ago Niat my friend bought us tickets to see the preview for Queen & Slim.

The movie was more than I expected it to be, and yes I cried. I cried because as much as they added some bits that in reality isn’t logical at least not for black people. I still loved the whole movie, cried and felt it. It was funny and it had culture but still a whole load if anxiety because all you think is; what the fuck would I do in that position?

I don’t want to tell too much about the movie because I do think everyone should watch it. It is very good movie and it makes you laugh. Not a typical American movie but it reminds me of Moonlight. If you haven’t seen it yet, please do. The pictures and the artistic way Queen and Slim is filmed. More movies like this, my type of movies.

After the movie we stayed to have a glass of wine and wind down before going home. I had olives like always, I live olives and these ones tasted like feta cheese. Anyway, came home pretty late but it was a good Friday evening.


Today I feel mashed up. Is it the weather or is it the effort I put in the gym? I have lifting heavier, been working very structured and carefully with my gluteus as my left is very week.

I have been watching so many videos on how to have better posture, techniques etc. The worse things is, injures when you are on your pace and doing great at the gym. So what do I do at the gym exactly?

Firstly I warm up as always, my warm up can be different but it always includes chin ups. Everyday, and because lifting your own weight is key – for me at least. I do one day full body and the other days I focus on two parts, abs and arms or abs and legs. Abs is always included as I still want to get stronger core. The stronger core I have the better I perform.

And I also see that the more work I put with my abs, the closer I get to get a nice result.

31 years old and still looking young. Please let me stay like this forever. Or at least let my body stay strong and young for 20-30 more years. I’m asking for a lot.

I’m doing some yoga today as I need to stretch this body in a class. I haven’t been consisten with yoga for a very long time, due to classpass not being active and also the cold. I just wanna go home as soon as finish work and gym is literally just by the station. Harder to miss, but yoga isn’t nearby me at all. Think I’m gonna sign up for Bikram Yoga London in London Bridge and continue with it, more so when the weather is warmer. The worse thing I know is the sweats afterwards, I sweat soooo much and get rid of soo much water that it is ridiculous but the skin is so fresh.

London Bridge is perfect and I still have some credits there I can use. Yes, let’s go back to my routines. I loved the bikram in Clapham, that was is soo nice and the teacher is my favourite.

Another Weekend

How I love to be surrounded by nature, and I’m so lucky to live a bit far out in London. I have a lot of greenery around me and the fact that you can just go for a walk and recharge. Loving it. I was born in a small city and every weekend my nan took us to the country side, which was where my grandparents lived. My nan still lives in the same house, renovated but the same place. Anyhow, as I was born in a small city nearby the jungle. Yes, my soul and body is always in need to be one with nature. Reason why I don’t like man made cities.

On Saturday, Niat and I took ourselves to BoxHill but another side of the park from previous times. It was bliss, it was very cold but so nice to just breath nice air and just walk and talk about life.

I didn’t take many pictures but it is a beautiful place I recommend everyone to have a wonder around.

Lately I have been meditating again everyday, and wow I feel so good. So good that I created another meditation group and yes, I feel like sharing this with every one. I also did some tarot cards with Niat at the park, we sat and did a little bit of meditation and read some cards. I never do myself but I like to do on others, still learning tho. Very basic.

On Sunday, I woke up with a sore throat and was feeling shit. At some point we needed to do some food shopping so that was done, and had some lunch. Took a walk with the dog (we are taking care of a family dog) and sat in the sun. I came home and slept from 2pm to 9pm. I was knackered and tired and exhausted and everything. I haven’t slept like that for some time, I can’t even remember last time I had such a sleep.

After I woke up, I made a major prep for the week. Roasted veg, so it is easier during the week. We only add the protein, but saves us so much time. More structure is needed in my life.

Anyhow, gonna have some dinner now and relax. I made it to the gym and I have another meditation session before bed. Feel at ease. Thank God!